Friday, April 4, 2014

Feelings

So what is feelings to you?

I would just go to the straight point rather than doing a defination of; such as What is Romance Feeling or Anger Feeling or Suspicious Feelings?

I wish I could have more time to blog about feelings, but well, I think is just a waste of time as everyone would know the general concept behind it.

Well, I just lost a girl-friend when I finished my high school. And I told myself, losing one friend does not mean I looses all. But if yes, I would not mind it as I will tell myself that those friends are not worth mixing with. (Well, unless they are pretty good friends and I keep on loosing them one-by-one and eventually I loosed the best one, and I will know that is all my fault for not care my friends enough)

Years passed and I moved on forgetting all about her...

Until I met back one of my high school mate, a guy. And we used to chat at the group chat and hang out for a drink. But in the end, that doesn't last long either. I no longer friends with him as that moment he speak such a rude words towards my friend and I was asking him to get himself back to reality and he should apologize to my friend after picking himself pieces by pieces of what he have just done. He ignored and think he was talking all the right things, but seriously he's not. Until his friend called me and apologize behalf of him to me but I told his friend that it wasn't his fault and he shouldn't apologize behalf of his friend. In the end, I deleted him from my Facebook as he totally doesnt even speak a word with me after. So why should I keep him then if he wants to hate me that much?

So, I lost two friends now. But it doesn't matter to me.

Finally, I had this one :-

Last few days I was having a very big headache. I just couldn't sleep as my head ache alot. Really alot. But I forced myself to work as there's many things to rush. So I went to work the next day.

And to gain some ideas, I logged in to the client's Facebook page and I started to say "Whoah... what happen to this logo and why is god damn ugly? who the hell did it?"

I know my words are awful, but that was the usual me to speaks up like that as it looks REALLY UGLY. I don't quite like to lie to myself unless I knows who did it and I will definately just keep quite.

In the end, I knows who did that and to my surprise he was so hurt of what I have said and doesn't even talks to me after and he somesort of throw tantrums to another person which I think he did was not right.

So in the end, I messages him by telling I am sorry of what I have said earlier and hoping he doesn't throw tantrums or accusing or mad to the other person.

And well before sending to him, I have three options in my mind.

Is either :
1. He will not reply my message because he asleep
2. He will not reply my message and he is really busy in working
3. He doesnt bother to reply my message even after reading it.

So I sent.

An hour passed. Another hour passed, and it's gonna be 2am (which means few hours passed), there's no reply. So I started to think positive as he might have just falls sleeping. But, the other person told me he was in Facebook - online-ing.

Ok, FUCK IT.

Well, I appologize and this is still what I get in return? Duh.

Somehow, since he's play such an important role to the person I knew, I try to tolerate with him and went to Morning Market to buy roasted pork as is part of what he likes to eat usually. So when I reached office, I ate some (Well, I bought the roasted pork for like RM15) and left some for him when he gets to the office.

So, he walked in. Sat down. Put aside my Roasted Pork and do his work like he's really really really busy. And before I went to lunch, I told him that thing was Roasted Pork and asked him to eat it. But he told me "I am full and had my lunch outside"

Oh well, I told him, he can have it as I have more of it this morning.

So evening came, and he take the pack and put at the pantry. I saw it and well, I just finished it all myself.

Conclusion is, I have try making my move and he doesn't even accept because of the crap thing I mention. I even told him that might not what he wants to do but the client wanted him to do it and I know he have to do it as client pays him. So why does he have to be so mad at what I have said?

Did he realised that he actually hurt me before not once, not twice but quite some times as well due to when I asked his opinion on the design wise, he just smack it up. So in the end I choose not to ask him anything as his sense of seeing the design and my sense of seeing the design was not the same. He should realise if the words he used on other people is really hurtful, then he should take others comment from other people whether is positive or negative.

I wondered if client rejected all his works, so does he fucking hate that client alot?

I just don't get it. Even when we were friends before and he talks alot like he's the NO.1 and no one will achieve what he having now. But sometimes I tolerate with him if it makes sense and I don't agree with him if it's sounds kinda bullshit.

Well, if he wants to act like a child or a baby that needs protection from someone, just go ahead. I don't need to care about your feelings at all and on the very first place, I don't even need to apologize to you either as what I said is what I really thinks of. If you couldn't accept it, then why the heck are you in this LINE for?

Think about it. If someone truly hurt your feelings, they are EVIL.

But if someone wanted to let you know how they feels about it, and you can't accept it, you're not an ANGEL but you are STUBBORN.

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