Friday, March 28, 2008


Anyone who did this like what I did as shown below??

It's kinda like SHUTTER feel. 2 combination into 1. But it's fun. At 1st Fatty asked me to weigh, see whether I got put on some weight or not. Well, still da same for me. 43kg.

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Aint this sweet? 1st time I timbang timbang together. Though abit childish la. This I know also. But at least I try one time ya...Hmmm...

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(From Left: MC Choc Ice Cream, Right: My Asam Boi from De'Pastry)

And this picture above... Fatty buy and make those cute cute happie pictures for me. I tot the ice cream is he make fun of me, cause that day I was wearing specs and (actually I phobia when wear specs infront of him, since got one day, I OT gau gau..den my look very "chan" and he call me aunty look >.< ) I tot he draw and gip me see that IT WAS ME. But nope, he say it's FATTY LAI DE... Weee....heheheheh....

Then the Asam Boi drink... Hmpph... I saw the pictures I oso lam lam dei oredi.

3rd thing, since I'm still wearing the ring which John gave me on 2005, Fatty no "song" when see that I wore it. I told Fatty, it's actually my ring lai de. Yup, if for him to wear back ex stuff, I volcano oso mari belanda liao. haha.

Anyway, will dedicate one to him:-

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Hope he likes it (^^,)

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Fatty and Xter @ at genting,
after fatty fixed his colleague car at genting also.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008


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Gary - download
shu dao wu da ying wo- cao ge
Promise me on the count of five

This was introduce by fatty when he accompany me stay up OT alone at nite. Not that he said introduce la. But he told me he like this Track 2. He said, when the 1st time he saw this MTV/song at Astro, he suddenly think of me (though I'm not his gurl dat moment)

As I'm those busybody type, I listern quitely when I was alone in the office the next day. Keep on repeating the track again and again - as it was sang in Mandarin Version. Sooner or later, I fall for this song and had the intention to find the lyrics.

Since fatty logged in my mac that time, In the past history, I tracked down that he also finding the same lyrics - but of cuz, it was written down in Mandarin. So, I copied down the Chinese text and try hard to find the translation for this song.

Now I know what's the meaning behind it. Hmmm.. So lam....
(or is he trying to impress my heart??)

Pin Yin
di yi ci kan zhe ni jiu wei ni xin dong
cong ming de wo zhen neng rang ni zou
di er ci kan jian ni wo jing ran shi kong
shi wo de cuo qing ni yuan liang wo
di san ci kan jian ni xiang yao gao su ni
wo zhen de ai ni shi zhen de ai ni
di si ci kan zhe ni wo you xie yao jiu
qing ni neng gou an an jing jing de ling ting

yi. rang wo bao hu ni
er. rang wo zhao gu ni
san. suo you de yao qiu bu neng dang zuo you xi
si. jie shou zhe ming yun
wu. yong yuan bu fen li
shuo ni yuan yi
na zui hou yi ge yi ding yao shuo ni yuan yi

Want be your lover want be your man
wo zhi yao ni kai xin duo yi dian
wo zhi xi wang gei ni duo yi dian

Can you be my lover don’t wanna be your friend
gei ni xing fu dao yong yuan

gei ni xing fu mei yi tian
ying wei wo Want be your lover want be your man
shuo ni hai pa ying wei shou guo shang
bu xu yao hai pa ying wei wo bu shi ta

On our first meeting, you moved my heart
If im smart, how could I let you go
On our second meeting, I actually lost control
Its my fault, please forgive me
On our third meeting, I want to tell you
I really love you, really love you
On our fourth meeting, I have some requests
I hope you can listen to me, quietly

One. Let me protect you
Two. Let me take care of you
Three. Don't take my request as a game
Four. Accept this fate
Five. Don't ever leave me

Say 'I do'
Lastly, you must please say you do

Want be your lover want be your man
I only want you to be happier
I only hope to give you more

Can you be my lover don’t wanna be your friend
Give you everlasting bliss
Give you bliss everyday

Because I Want be your lover want be your man
You are scared, because you've been hurt
Don't be afraid, because I'm not him


At 1st I was very unhappy of what my bro did to me. Cause it was xcited when I heard that he's going to Singapore and inviting me go along also. But never know that yesterday we went out for a drink, he told me his cousin, his cousin's soon-to-be wife and another one called Ken will be joining us for the Singapore trip. I was super upset as I planned to go Singapore for so so so LONG!

Anyway, when I got to work this morning. I changed my MSN title regarding bout the Singapore trip was cancel. Super unhappie. Even one of my fren gave me a note that where and where the place I should go when I arrived at Singapore. Totally blown out.

Nicole chatted with me. I was DUH... But even I told Nicole no need to tell Lou that I was unhappy because I failed to go to singapore, but she still go and tell Lou. And dat time I was having my dinner at Andy Restorant - there's my phone ring and my bro asked some questions and den lead to Singapore matters. From what he told me, he tot that KEN (my another god bro) will be going, and that's make no seat for my fatty. Haih... But now since Ken not going, so Nam can squeeze in and I still can make it to Singapore

HOORAAAY!!! Super thanks to Nicole anyway.

Hmmm..besides, because yest I was upset, I blow everything to fatty over the phone conversation. My voice sounds down.

But guess what?

I'm having OT btw. And he dropped by to accompany me since I'm rushing to do my website. But he went off afterwards to join his friend at KIP area for a drink. But before he left, he told me one thing that he wanted to book the travel to Pulau Redang on July. I told him, July beach is aint good. Then only I know the reason why he wanna book on July. Coz our Burfday falls on that same month! Aint he sweet??? Even besides that, he called me this afternun to let me know about the Cameran trip since I cant make it to Singapore. But now, I got the chance!! Wah lao..very da happie....

Anyway, I haeve lunch with my ex today. I neva knew he would called me for the 1st time to have lunch with me, since he's working nearby my work place. But ever since, I will tell fatty that John came and find me lunch. At least a notice to let him know, dun feel like wanna hide something to him. I know is bad la to have lunc wif my ex, especially for this ex because of him, I've been really down for over a yr and a half. Hearing that he have a gurlfren on Jan, I started to let go of him and continue my journey without turning back. I'm brave!! Yeah!

Until then I met dou, following by fatty. Fatty might over worried when I told him I lunch with John. He somekind like phobia abit. But, normal to have this kind of phobia. If for my situation, ahem! He gonna eat shit!! hahaha...

Well, while eating lunch with John, neva knew he still remember many stuff between me and him. I totally forgotten some of it, until he reminded me. I told him to forget everything that me and him were together, but he told me that not everything that can be erased. He even asked me to be his gf back and will gip me phone and sub one credit card for me to use. Well, when I'm with him for the year and so, he really never used my money. Infact, he spends on me but usually the things I wanna buy, I buy it from my own pocket money. Dont feel like using his money to buy my own stuff.

Besides, he suddenly talked about the gold ring which he gave me on 2005. I neva notice he wore that ring. Then he told me one part that when he with his gurlfren that time (after i broke up wif him a yr ago ltr) his gurlfren is not pleasant when seeing him wear that ring (which john did mention to her gua about the ring). I told John, since if his GF is not happy bout the ring, he can either throw it away or put it aside. If for me, I oso will turns unhappy to see my present boyfren wearing RING of the PAST. Who will happy right? But he told me back, is just a ring wut. But hey, It's consider my RING you know. Coz he bought for me and I gave him back the ring.

Anyhow, I accidentally wear it until i got back to office and found out that I'm still wearing it. So I msgs him:

xter: Hey Ur ring arr...
xter: Den ar throw away lor?
John: Throw u la...dun throw my ring....either gv u wear 1st...ok?then u owe me
xter: U dare throw me mea? Wahaha. K la. Next time gip u bek.
John: K...

Really makes me wonder, how come he still wants this ring kinda badly?? Well, just me and him know what's the reason. Plus nicole also. And also, he still say he still keeping those pictures we took at bangkok. Well, this pictures... I got told him before when I break up with him. He can throw it away if he wants to. Or if his gf dont like, he can throw away also. But neva know, he told me he still keeping it and his gf doesnt know that time.

And he kept saying - something like, how good if me and him were married that time and we will be still couple until today. Well, past is past dear. I dont know what to do when he told me bout our past together, bringing me to see justin, been there alot when I need him the most sometimes (not on justin case of cuz).

Who can help me to overcome this??

Monday, March 17, 2008

C18 - Bangsar

Since friday I was having a huge headache, I took rest after a half day leave. Charging my energy and hoping that I might get well before night falls. Fatty did ask me to stay home, and he wouldn't be going to the Bangsar Nightclub. But since promised has been made, why not and give some support to Fatty's fren - Cindy who took part in the contest of modeling.

Fatty fetched me after work and off we went for our dinner and back to Onn Zai house which he insist in fetching us go and back. Sei Mou! Cause if Onn Zai fetch, sure will go back home very late de. Hmphh...

Besides fetching us, there was a guy named as B - which stands for BOY (Sorry Dude, I forgottten your name. Izzit Ah Liang or Ah Leong??? I've totally lost his name) and at the first sight, I aint click with him - until we got in the NightClub which known as C18, and he will bring out some conversations. Otherwise you will be bored to dead man!!!

I was pretty scared for Onn Zai actually. Is like eveytime he ask Fatty to join them clubbin, and Fatty dont wanna go. MEANING - HE THINKS I LOCKUP FATTY, which is not true. Kesian me. But never know in the NightClub, he's quite friendly person. Even me and fatty went kissing and hugging each other - giving the most SPECIAL LIGHTS to both of them. Bad huh we??

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Here - Onn Zai and BOY. My Goodness, they look alike couples.

And 2nd thing, if any one who got friends which born in the rabbit year, PLEASE, PLEASE LET ME KNOW!! Cause both of this brothers is fighting for their love over the Rabbit Year.

Main thing is not aboutUS. Is about CINDY! She got in the TOP 20 and out of TOP 20, she got into TOP 15 and to TOP 5. IS SO AWESOME!! Should see how beautiful she was. Even, she got the most ASTONISHING name as the model. Really really happie for her...

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*I like this looks da most. (da one wif the tattoo on her arms)

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As for the PRINCESS, Well since she called as PRINCESS - meaning she is the TOP. But this aint fair. She's the MC's SISTER!!! Is so cheating and so fake.

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"san ban" around 2.30am. Onn Zai was way too blur in driving, so BOY drove his car and Fatty falls asleep at my shoulder. I should take his picture that time. He sleep like a baby. When the time he going to fetch me back, he drive so slow and the way he drove - he look excatly like a TURTLE! Wahahahhahahahahahahahahahha........

Is not that he drive until like a turtle, but is THE WAY he driving. Hunch back. Blur Blur. Uncle Look. Haha. I did ask him to have a sleep 1st, cause is way too dangerous when he drink and drive. But he say he can manage it. Well....

Even when he dropped me off, I was hoping and praying he would arrive home safetly. Hoping for his call, and finally the ringtone came. Wishing him good night and ...

AND the next day, I drove him to work and back from work. Funny is - when I fetch him back, he look hyperactive. He keep reading the SMS which I store under his name in a folder for more than 350++ SMSs but under 400. While reading those past SMS which he sent to me, he will laugh at it and finally he said "why last time I like to zing gu u wan?" EXCUSE ME, Ask Yourself la! Even got one time he SMS me saying "dont want choi you". Ok lor. Dun choi la. I nothing wan de. But in the end, he give me a call and talk wif me. ADUIII... Say dunwan CHOI me, but come and ring me up. C Boh!

Sometimes I will think, how come I like this guy huh? I use to hate him alot, but now.. erm..........

++and here's the kitten from Fatty's house. Supposed to have 4 kittens, but the other one went missing++
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mother cat @ ker lian (means pity in mandarin)

Friday, March 14, 2008

Heavy Head

Supposed yesterday going to Aloha for farewell for Devi's colleague friend. I was unsure when I will be back home, as there is alot of job rushing. Eventually the time was cancelled, as I'm having OT, Fyuen not free and Georghe was not free also. Well, hope can have dinner together again when everyone is free.

Sinced the clubbing was cancel, and fatty asked me whether am I intrested to go to the Taman Ehsan Pasar Malam. I tot of having a rest, but since he told me that he going to take his cousin out, well - of cause I wanna have a look at his cousin :: and since he said that his cousin is quite handsome!!

After bath and everything, I went to the kitchen to have some bites on the chicken wings which mum dar bao from Pizza. I ate two ot it and drank herbal soup which mum prepared for me before I'm going out. Never knew, I got headache. Strong head pains that makes my body unbalance to walk. I lied down on my bed and about 2-3minutes, I woke up and try to walk again. To my dissapointment, the heavy pain didnt go off. I thought, might be my contact lens which makes my head heavy and pain. So I decided to take it off and wear my specs again. But ... IT'S STILL THE SAME!!!

Gosh.. I called up fatty and told him not to come. From 8pm, I slept till 5am in the morning. And I continue to sleep until 8am, till fatty give me a wake up call.

Once woke up, I just feel abit dizzy and tot - I might be alright today. It's better than yesterday. Drove to work, and headache came back after I got out from the washroom. It was like 12pm dat time. I took a short nap, and been turning my body left and right, till my head get from bad to worst. OH GOD!!!!

When June going out for lunch, I told her not to pack-back anything for me as I might leave the office - having half day leave later. After few minutes she left, I force myself to wake up and walk to my car and drove to the clinic. Head still so heavy. What has happened to me? I asked myself.

Before that, I called fatty that my headache strikes back and going to see doctor later. He didnt offer to bring me go to see doctor also. And it was his lucnh time. My goodness. Nevermind la, I still have Baby Neo, and it can still take care of me. I pray to myself, hopefully I dont meet any accident. I cant turn my head or watever, I can onli see the front and by using my side mirrors. Cause once I turned my head to right or back, my headache attack back and giving me alot of god damn pain.

Reached Dr.AW. Luckily it aint many patient over there and by 5mins, My name was called out. I told doc what has happened to me. He told me that there might be 3 reasons of having headache.

1. Stress
2. Lack of Sleep
3. Menses

Then he asked me, are you having your menstruation now? I say yea. So it might causes it. I feel relieves when I got the answer. Doc say is normal sometimes when women is having their period and he gave me medi of coz. Besides, I told him - izzit I'm having low blood sugar? Doc say it's impossible, but I still wanna have a test of it. Asked for how much if testing for blood sugar, he said only RM5. Ok. I take it. After a light poke at my middle finger, seeing how he operate stuff, and the result was out - saying I'm normal. No low or high blood preassure.

How come har?? I want to have low blood preassure!!! So dat I can have feed myself into sweet world!!!! I DEMAND TO HAVE LOW BLOOD PREASSURE - pleaseeee.... I luv sweetening stuffffffzzzz... Slurpss.s.. Yummy...

So, carefully drove home and mum been worried about me. Reached home, I called fatty and later on, I sms to him saying " Haiya, if i know i'm half day off 2day, i can c my lessbian show!!!" And you know what this small baby fatty replied back? He said "Then u now go my hse take la..."


I'm here almost faint faint and numb numb, he still tell me go to his hse and take. Haih.. He supposed to reply me back by saying "you go and have a rest 1st la dear, when you getting better, I still can accompany you to watch it". See la. He totally different from Gab. At least Gab can say some sweet words to lam Nicole. Adui... Two different world...

Maybe just now I should drive, then bang my Baby Neo with others branded and imported car and if Fatty knew, I wonder which one he will worried the most. My life or The Imported Car. Or izzit he going to blame himself for telling me to get it from his house??

No one will know the answer - even not for me. Some might say, of cause he care for your life la, you sei soh mui. But - sometimes, when real things happen, it will be in a different story.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Thanks Lotsa : Wykie

I've been squeezing my time so that I can do my portfolio before the interview. And since, if my portfolio is not done yet, I cant send out my resume. Worst still, means I cant apply for job or send out my resume. That's the part I worried the most.

Each time I got extra time, I will do the portfolio. But after finish some of it, I will not satisfied and will redo all over again and again and again. That's why I'm still half way stuck. I've tried to seek advice from Nicole, on how she did for her interview. Either way was burn it into a CD, else print out the artwork.

Print Out The Artwork. That's what I thought of it too. But 1st thing 1st, it's a waste of time. And 2nd thing, I need to bring it to cosway for printing as well.

On lunch the other day, I bring out the same subject to June. She told me not to print, but to lend laptop from people or friends. And she teach me how to prepare myself when going for the interview and open the laptop - let it be in sleep mode, so it wont waste any of our time. That's a good idea coz I dont need to rethink how should I come out with my portfolio.

But the main thing is - WHERE CAN I FIND A LAPTOP???

And here - Wykie MSN me after my lunch. Besides, I aim on her also. Cause I know she cin cai person and will help friends if she can help de. So, I sun pin ask permission from her. Thanks gurl. I promise to take care of her laptop and will bring back to her everytime I finished my interview. Just scared abit mafan only, cause this time I might go for alot of interview - IF I COULD.

My burden was release all of a sudden. Just the main thing, I have to do the open size of my packaging - into a 3D box. It would be more fun to see more stuff anyway.

Well, been going out since from last friday till today - Wednesday. Thursday might go clubbing and Friday might go give support for fatty's best friend cause she got into finalist!!! Congratulation to her 1st. She's pretty!!!! I like to see her, cause she owes a very deep sweet dimple. Guys will sure lam her de...

Main thing, I dunno whether I should go for teh clubbing or not. Mum nag me today. Say I've been going out alot. Luckily she didnt shout or throw tantrums at me. Maybe I'm cute nowadays, so she "mm sai dak". Wahahahahahha... Just a joke. But at least, I'm still in the house and eat some mum's cook food. The other day, mum dar bao bak kut teh for me. Just recently, she make my favourate dish - chicken, sausage and roasted pork + cabbagge. She's good to me huh?? Yupee...

Today supposed to watch STEP UP II. Reached 1utama at 8.30pm and I found out that the show is limited. Left 9seats only - and that's was the FRONT ROW! How come now everyone rushing for STEP UP II!!!! Why want rush together with me jek... Kesian me. I wanna watch this show oso dont have faith. Izzit need to buy DVD to watch liao? Anyway, we bought a show called 10,000BC. Fatty say, if like that he better bring me to Pavillion. He knows I like Pavillion. Well, next time only go ner. Cause he also been tired and wakes up late.

Oh ya...sweetest thing was ....


while going to work today. As usual, I will look at the center mirror. And to my surprise, I saw fatty car was behind me! That was unusual. I really really got a surprise ner, yet happie since can bump into him FIRST TIME.

Okiez, back to 1utama. We went to this Japanese Restorant called Nippon. We tried went there before last time, but usually the SAME GUY will told his that it was closed and tell us come back tommorrow with a sweet smile and polite manners. So this time, we finnaly have the opportunity to eat over there. Fatty was happie, cause the dish he called was what he wanted to eat for so long.

After the meal, we went for a short walk and I came across with this kinda cute and adorable somesort of animal mascot. It was form by putting those tinny and normal type a balloons.

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And there you go.. fatty magnet to Mac rather than to me


Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Please Dont Come Back

I've been thinking whether should I go to find my ex or DONT??

Not to patch back with him of cause. It's definately a No No No Way (esp with HIM). But is his stuff. His VCDs and his money which I helped him to save up. Though is not much la, but it's still his.

I've been lagging this matter for 3 months. I have to make up my mind this time. So after work, I sms saying "are you at home?" After fatty called, Dou call up saying what happen and this la, that la. Tell me dont come. No people at home. We meet soon. Even when I say I just gip him things and i will go back. He say, next time la. I say next time I'm not free. He asked why? I say my job problem la. Then he say, what's wrong with your job problem??

UGHH!! I wanna BOMBBBB liao!!!


Asked me alot of questions. I hanged up his phone. Useless I'm continue to speak with him. But still I intend to give all his stuff back TODAY!

While on the way to his house, he called up again. Asking whether am I at home, he will come to see me. I lied that I'm not at home. I will be going out. Then he say, "like that ar, den next time lor". I say ok. But I still go to his house. I DONT FUCKING CARE!

Reached his place, the door was totally open, but locked. So, I put his stuff on top of the TV. No one was home. I feel relief that his stuff I've returned. I dont want everyday I keep on worrying that I have still related with him.

I called him when I got inside my car. I told him I've returned his stuff and it was on top of the table. Then he say "aiyuh, if like that - u come to my working place ma. Sure got people steal wan. Got people at home mea?" I say no..No people at home. If u sked people steal, u go back home take la. Got vcd and your money. He said 'Wah.. lagi sure kena curi. U better come and give to me here la." I so fucktup! Cause at 1st I told him, if no one is at home, I go to his working place and hand it to him hand in hand. But he insist dunwan. So, what can I do? I fucktup, and told him - U go balik rumah take la. I away from your home adi la. And I hang up the phone again.


When reached home, I feel totally down. Though relax abit, But dunno what the hell, I feel down also.

Round 9.30pm like that, dou called me again.


I picked up the call and ask what?

Dou: Where are you now?
xter: At home la.
Dou: You say u go out?
xter: (oh, fucking shit!) Yea, I'm outside but is at people house.
Dou: What happen to your working place?
xter: I not free la.. I always OT, so not free adi
Dou: Ohh.bout the internet things, can you give me the address which can log in your details?
xter: (WTF you still need to see my things????!) I dont know what you talking about
Dou: The things where got your pictures and you write de lea.
xter: I forgot adi.
Dou: That wan is your things woh. You sure remember wan
xter: I dunno la. I see how la
Dou: If you free, den u msg me the name la ok
xter: yala yala.

Hung up his phone again. Fucking shitty life!!!!!

Feeling very miserable. So I open my internet line. Looking out who is out there can chat and cheer me up. Luckily got afew msgs me. Dexter, John, Kee Yung, Wykie...

Then I went to bed earlier. Roun 12.30am, Dou call me again


I tulan adi, so I switched off my phone. Very very FUCKING TULAN.

But before I switched Off, I smsed to Fatty, telling him dont call me.

Sleepless night I had. Very very moody...