Tuesday, December 24, 2013

DIY Socks Toy

I was back home and laid lazily around the hall and thinking something to do to distract my attention from facing myself infront of the computer.

So I tot of making another bunny which I have promised my Godbro - Ken that I will give one to him for his little daughter.

And I started to kick-start it from 10.30pm till 3.00am on 23rd Dec 2013 (Mon)

I really hope his daughter will like my little Labbit. I even give it a Xmas ribbon :)

♪ ♫ We wish you a Merry Christmas ♫ ♪

Monday, December 16, 2013

I Miss I.P.O.H

YES! I really do - all of a sudden...

Previously I planned to go alone; just to get rid of my life in Kuala Lumpur (due to over-stressed work) and posted at Facebook saying - I planned to go alone to IPOH.


Eventually, my friend asked whether wanna go Ipoh together - and YES! Hooray...

I planned to post my Ipoh picture one day (wait till I rushed all my work 1st).

So, here's the shocking face I played with the painted girl at one of the street wall :)

We both looks so cute together :D

Friday, November 29, 2013

Korean Hangul .vs. Musical Notes

I remember the very 1st time I started learning piano; both theory and practical. I was a blank girl without knowledge of the scripts and notes. Bet everyone agrees too.

But in order to play the notes out, I have no choice but to learn and remember each of the keys, scripts, notes and everything. It was a waste to me that I didn't contd it ever since I started to went college. As far as I remember, I was passed about Gred 5 & 7 (either is practical and theory).

If I were to play back, I need time to practice it. I missed playing piano actually as I can play the song I like to listern. Too bad, my talent wasn't right for me yet.


Few years back I started to like korean alot. And till now, it's been like 10years and I still like korean alot. So I take one step ahead and started to watch alot of korean drama and catching slighly of their pronunciation and the meaning behind it. I joit down in my iphone notes and started to memorised whatever I can so I don't easily forget.

Just few days back before I went to bed, I decided to download korean apps and started to learn the hangul of it. It's cute to see korean wording as one word have at least 2-5 lettering inside to pronounce the sound out of it. And yes, is not easy as learning english. But I'm willing to give myself a try to get use to it.

I just took the iphone korean exam and I got 4 out of 10. Darn.

But still, I'm not giving it up yet.

I have started to try typing korean wording too "sa rang hae" - > 사 랑 해



Tuesday, November 26, 2013


Hashtag #shinefurry

I was supposed to blog this last friday ; 22 Nov - but tend to forget everytime I reached home as 1st thing 1st I need to take my dog for his usual dogrun (meaning - pee and poo) and after my bath, I will have to mop his floor and while waiting for the floor to keep clean, I have to apply medication to my dog.

That's the reason why I kept to forgot about this posting - until today, I realised that 26 Nov is the contest ends.

Below is the main title regards on what is the #shinefurry is all about.

"Want a healthy transformation for your dog? We (Pedigree Malaysia) are giving away 6 weeks worth of Pedigree products if your dog is selected as your dog deserves a healthy skin and shiny coat" 

This contest was actually informed by my colleague and the next morning I took few pictures of Fat-Fat and submitted it when I reached office - due to full of HAPPINESS :)

Is actually not because of the 6weeks worth Pedigree products for the main thing is - Is the FIRST time I ever submitted my dog to a contest. Though he was injured in the picture, but I just wanted to tell everyone that in this world, my dog - Fat-Fat existed!

He, is also part of my life due to he lives happy and sorrow with me for the last past 12 years and I'm happy that he still breathing even there's twice he doesn't really make it to survive but he had struggle his energy just to see the world for the 3rd time.

And here, before one day he would leaves me (I assure he have about 15 years the minimum and 18 years the latest, and I assume he is now 14-15years due to he was a big sized dog when he 1st came to my house for food) So that is why I plan to participate him to Pedigree as he have been a loyal to Pedigree for the past 12 years as well.

This is how I submitted Fat-Fat :

I took few of his gorgeous faces (Pedigree preferred to have the whole body shot and not only his adorable face) and I selected this one (as below), cause he was smiling happily :)

Bet he knows that he have to look handsome due to participate him to Pedigree Malaysia, huh?

And the next step is to go to their Facebook and clicked the following


Once you have done, it will have another message... *after you clicked Enter ->

After few hours, on the same day. One of the Pedigree member called me up and asking me about my dog and his condition. He even told me if I were part of the chosen one, they will have to come to my house to see my dog condition and the living environment as well.

I was fine for everything. And when I reached home that day, I ran to my dog, hugged him and told him that someone called me and asked about him ^^

But, some reason...

I wish Fat-Fat would recover soon. 

(He have rashes at his neck. His ear was way too dry. His right leg started to get injured abit. His right leg, side bones started to get pretty hurt due to putting up ice-cream stick for preventing him to bend his ankle. I really wish he could recover as fast as he could, so all the pain will fade away in just few days. I'm trying very hard to apply medication to him part by part, and hoping one day those injuries will varnished. 

*pray really hard to help Fat-Fat get well* )

Thursday, November 14, 2013

I hate that I care about you, and I hate it alot.

"I hate that I care about you"

That was the 1st phrase that popped-out from my head that my heart was totally boiling at the moment.

It was the phrase that someone texted me before. And it was :-

"I hate that I like you"

It was the moment I was confused. And I texted back saying " what do you mean by that ?"

And he replied (something like below, well...I've deleted the message anyway)

"I hate myself that I like you, which you always being nasty to me but yet I like you alot"

By then, only I know what is the phrase for.

And this time... I used this to someone.

Somemore I actually cracked my head to think just for the surprising and memorable day; once a life time.

But eventually, all I get was a complain and not a compliment, though in the end it was a thank you and fullstop.

And here, I promised my self.

That I will never - ever do such things anymore.

Tuesday, November 12, 2013


Hogsi, chu ah an nia?

How I wish someone will know what I'm writting today.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

The Heirs

One of my on-going korean drama this month. I shouldn't have start watching it. Is not that - NOT NICE, but; is REALLY NICE!

Been catching up the whole 10 eps for the past 2-3days. (Total 20EP need to finish this drama) and now I have to wait for 2EPs every week which I am gonna go BIT JOH SOH because the drama ends on December 12!


Feeling really regret that I start watching it. Hate the feeling of waiting for the episodes to be in streaming.

Anyhow, whoever loves watching korean drama should watch this and vote for "The Best Korean Drama of 2013" as I'm so gonna vote this and The Master's Sun too.

I still don't understand why am I so addicted to korean drama....

Maybe sometimes the guys treat the girl just like the scene below :)


He's pretty cute huh? Most of his wording is really sweet and touching.

I was supposed to catch up with Jin Hyuk (That's after I saw him at Gu's Family Book) but end up I falls for Lee Min-Ho (the above guy) now.

Min-Ho is young...really young with age 26. The reason I start liking Jin Hyuk is because he's 28, he's charming and have his own character and he even dropped out from UNI (most of the bio on korean actors or singers, they will have a clean data but Jin Hyuk is different) and is really difficult for me to fall for an older guy of Korean. 90% all of them just age within 23 - 26.

I catched up this scene just this morning at 3.45am; 10 Nov 2013 and contd to watch the next EP until 4.45am. The guy finally kissed the girl!

Really really nice drama....and the OST was nice to hear to; Love is the Moment

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

The Master's Sun - Touch Love

Touch Love

Right now...I have this song spinning over again and again in my head....

I've been wanted to sing this song so much, and I  practice-ed it hard. Besides, in every word of the song, I would intend to understand it and finding a way to know what it meant.

Let's enjoy this song together :)

PS: Is actually an OST soundtrack from the drama series called The Master's Sun. A very romantic movie that the women was actually seeing ghost all around her and she was afraid until she met the CEO of Kingdom Mall that was actually her shelter (to easily get off from the ghost that clings to her). With 17episodes that took me about 9days to finished it up.

Below I attached a direct-link-to-go to watch the full drama with english subtitle and also to download this Touch Love sang by Yoon Mi Rae.

*Believe me, I cried for few episode of it. It's almost similar to Ghost Whisperer. And this song; totally suit this drama. (Trust Me)

To download the song, click Touch Love
For online drama for this movie, click The Master's Sun

nae son kkeute
geudaega seuchimyeon
chaga wotdeon shimjange
ongiga beonjijyo

salmyeoshi dagaga
gidae goman ship jiman
geudaewaui georineun
job hyeo ji jil anhneyo

manjil suga eobseodo dwae
aneul sudo eobseodo dwae
Lonely love Yes I love you
nae unmyeong cheoreom
geudael neukkil su isseoyo

rallalla- ralla- ralla-
rallalla- ralla- ralla-
rallalla- ralla- ralla- ralla-
nae mam daheul su isseoyo

du soneul nae mireo
geudael jabgo shipjiman
deo meoreojil geot gata
geudae gyeoteul maem doljyo

saranghal su eobseodo dwae
daheul sudo eobseodo dwae
Lonely love Yes I love you
nan meolli seodo
geudael bol suga isseoyo

manjil suga eobseodo dwae
aneul sudo eobseodo dwae
Lonely love Yes I love you
nae unmyeong cheoreom
geudael neukkil su isseoyo

rallalla- ralla- ralla-
rallalla- ralla- ralla-
rallalla- ralla- ralla- ralla-
nae mam daheul su isseoyo
Lonely love

When you pass by my finger tips
Warmth spreads throughout
my cold heart

I want to softly go
to you and lean on you
But the distance between
us is not narrowing

It’s okay even if I can’t touch you
It’s okay even if I can’t hug you
Lonely love Yes I love you,
like my destiny
I can feel you

Lalala lala lala
Lalala lala lala
Lalala lala lala lala
My heart can reach you

I want to reach out
my hands and hold you
But it feels like we’ll get farther
apart so I just linger around you

It’s okay even if I can’t love you
It’s okay even if I can’t reach you
Lonely love Yes I love you,
even from far away
I can see you

It’s okay even if I can’t touch you
It’s okay even if I can’t hug you
Lonely love Yes I love you,
like my destiny
I can feel you

Lalala lala lala
Lalala lala lala
Lalala lala lala lala
My heart can reach you
Lonely love

Fat-Fat, Please Get Well



When everytime I saw him bleed. Though is just a light bleed, but ... it just breaks my heart. How I really wish I can bare his pain. Bare his operation and bare everything that he's undergoing right now. Though in front of me, he acted like a baby, or spoil brat. But I know he's suffer and he doesn't want me to worried him.

This is what fat-fat has undergoing with.


Yes, he have an operation at his end ankle and he have got stitches. Doc said that if he take care of everything, his stitches can be removed on 19 Oct 2013 (Saturday). But due to on last Thursday and Friday, I noticed that his wound is not healing, yet bleed. 

On Saturday, he kept moving around when I trying to bandage him up. I know he suffer, but that was the best I can do for him to keep him heal till the next Saturday came.

So on last Sunday,  as usual I woke up early and try to give a new bandage for him. I just couldn't see it anymore and I took him to see the doc early morning. Reached the vet about 9.45am. Waited one and half hour for my turn. Doc said that one of his stitch was off. He tried to clean everything up and I have to bring him go daily for clean-up and bandage for the following day.

On Monday (which means Today 14 Oct 2013), I reached the Vet at 9.30am. While doc opening up his bandage, he told me that another 2-3 more stitches broke and I have to leave my dog there to get new stitches.

I was seriously down.

However, I still need to go to office. I was mood-less.

I called up the vet and asked if my dog can be in their cage until his wound get heal and they said yes. I know I'm cruel for putting fat-fat at the vet area, when he actually needed me the most. But I just can't to see him move around, stitches fell off, he have to get stitches again and everything is repeating all over again. I rather I be the bad person and wait for at least 1-2weeks until his wound are heal.

But of cause, I will be taking him for a walk everyday - 9.30am and also by 7.30am. That means I will go work late and off work early. I just hope everyone will tolerate with me for my working hours.

I pray hard for you fat-fat so you could recover.



Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Pray for Fat-Fat that he stay strong.

On last saturday (05 Oct 2013), as usual I bring fat-fat for his morning walk. And after, I went to take baby neo for a repair (well, i was unlucky that my car was hit and run while I was working at the office. It was a bad luck day on my friday night T_____T Had deep scratches and dented as well. Duh~ ). Ate my breakfast and dabao food for my mum.

So when I reached home, as usual fat-fat will come and greet me. I gave the food to my mum and wanted to go out, but as I was walking passed fat-fat I saw something that stopped me.

It was this wound.

It happens on this year June that he got this lump. I went to the usual vet clinic that I always bring him. But the doctor doesnt allowed me to have fat-fat undergo an operation. Saying that he was quite old to do an operation unless is worsen everything. Else, this kind of thing can be maintain by giving him antibiotic and another kind of medication.

I've been feeding on and off for the past few months until just last saturday. I can't hardly bare to look at it.

Luckily Ken was the one who fetched me home and he offered for me to take fat-fat hop inside his car and rushed us to the vet clinic that fat-fat usually went.

The doc asked what's wrong and I showed him his wound. He told me that I can bring my dog to UPM, Serdang as they can do operation over there. Asked why not him? He said that is a joint area at his ankle and is pretty hard to do the operation and need a professional to do it.

Unless, I can everyday clean his wound and apply medi and bandage it up to avoid the flies laying eggs on the wounded area. I told him that I can't always do that and yet, fat-fat is not sleeping inside the house, so is pretty hard to keep him really clean.

Anyway, I asked whether is Serdang still open but he said their business hour is same like government. =__=||

Somehow, in the end he introduce me to another clinic nearby Carrefour, Kepong. I was afraid that he was asking me to go to one of the vet clinic there (which is an indian doctor and he have put my previous dog into a deep sleep). But luckily it was another one.

Waited till the door was open (lunch from 12.30pm - 2.30pm) and the doctor checked on fat-fat. Saying his bone started to bend (just same like human. as u becoming more older, your bones tend not to be straighten but crooked abit) and asked is it been a long time his body shape looks like that. But I told him I couldn't notice it as all the while, it looks the same to me :(

Only, I noticed that the doctor was actually from UPM (I had a deep relief - finally)

He even mention that my dog is quite old and he need to do a blood test for him. Saying, that he need to see his kidney and liver are good. And if it's not, then they have to cure it one by one. (Example, let's say the kidney and liver is not healthy. So they have to treat the kidney 1st and then the liver, and only in the end to do the operation part). So the result took within 24hours and cost only RM90.

I can't sleep that night as I've been thinking : what else if fat-fat have a very unhealthy kidney and liver and other things too. what else if...what else if???

I was so down. So sad. I just have to pray really hard to God that I need fat-fat to stay strong and healthy. If, (touch wood), something turns to be a bad news, I might just clean the wound everyday myself if I know to treat the other parts may cause me a real bomb which I really can't afford it.


So the next day, I called the nurse when Ken texted me that the nurse tried calling me but couldn't get through. (Well, luckily they have asked for another 2nd contact number incase they cant contact me).

Is a good news! Saying fat-fat condition is good and need to go fasting from 10pm till 9.30am (without food and drinks) for the undergoing operation on Monday.

I rushed out, kissed fat-fat. Saying thanks to him that he have kept himself so healthy for the past 12years that I have looked after him. I really wanted to cry that moment. But, at the same time I have been changing and applying the cream and bandage him up myself for 3times.

On monday, As usual I bring him go for his morning walk. But, when he reached home, he wanted to drink water as usual but I hide his bowl and no-where to be found. He kept going to his bowl of water twice that moment. I wanted to really cry!! But he need to go fasting. I even not give him a thing to eat in the morning. I am so cruel :(

So, I rushed and bring fat-fat go for the operation. Paid a RM200 deposit. There have a CCTV, and I can see fat-fat doesnt want to go inside the cage T_____T It was so darn painful... I don't have the chance to whisper to him and say "STAY STRONG AND I DEFINITELY WILL TAKE YOU HOME NO MATTER WHAT HAPPEN TO YOU"

On monday night I felt so lonely. Usually I will have to rush home and take fat-fat a short night walk. But that night, I just parked my car and go inside the house. Huh...

On Tuesday, early morning at 9.30am, I called the clinic and she said I can take fat-fat home. It was the happiest news ever~

I rushed there, saw fat-fat. Hugged him and bring him for a walk outside. And go back to the clinic to pay the remaining bills. (Well, all of it include the cream, consultation fees, operation, injection, blood test costed RM540)

Can't wait for anything and I had a picture with fat-fat together ^^


I bring fat-fat goes home. And yes, he drank alot of water.

And not forgetting, I gave him as usual : his morning breakfast , Gardenia wholemeal bread (his favourite)

 And after his bread, he just relaxed...

Until when I reached home today, I saw him greet me with a limping leg. (heart breaks again). I rushed to take him for his night walk again (a slight walk to let him pee and poo) and took him straight back home. Cleaned and washed all of his floors myself and accompany him awhile + whispering to him and giving him hope that he just need to bare the pain for just 10days.

Still praying for fat-fat that he can stay strong~


Saturday, September 21, 2013

3D Floor Arts : Publika

Ever wanted to have snapshot a 3D floor art in Malaysia?

Grab your chance now~

I got to know this while I was scrolling down to Publika's oldest feed. Went there with one of my friend and I tried captured the angle. End up, rejected by my friend many times. Until, I went to the place I wanted my picture to be taken by my friend.

It's not easy to take the good shot of the 3D view. You have to stand an angle, with the correct position and the height of your camera plays the important role too.

So, here's the view...of me standing on top of the building!

Somehow, this art may not be appreciate by others as if you were just there, it would give you an impression that "what is this sticker lying so unwanted?"

Why do I say so?

As I was just standing at the side corner with my friend discussing on how's the angle should work, those passer-by just come in and out, walking all over. It breaks my heart to see them doing it like arts would never be appreciated.

But do you know that Art can perform something GREAT?

Somehow, foremost needed to thanks the MCM My CyberMarket which Located in Cyberjaya, KL that did this with putting much effort! Great Job indeed and Thanks for bringing Publika to LIVE!

ps : I would not want to say where is this level or near to which entrance. Try and hunt it. I'm pretty sure is still there for the time being...Have fun photoshooting peeps~

Wednesday, July 17, 2013


A shortform of "dor dor lan yeh" means, all sorts of lame fucking reason.

I've learned a NEW word! And I'm gonna like it.


Well, this is not the point in fact of the DDLY. The fact is :


It was supposed to be my SPECIAL DAY.

Yes! My BIG DAY instead - 30 :(

But...in the end.. the biggest thing is : there's this guys; all of a sudden appearing in my life.

Well, let me start on this.

1st Guy
I was supposed to inform him that I will be delivering his goods to his marketing in-charge on a date given. But in the end, we have been whatsapping each other for more than an hour. I believe he was just off-worked and wanted a good rest and conversation. So we chatted and he's a kind of man that talks wonderland of disney such as Cinderella and Prince Charm. Well, just so far I know that, he hikes too which is great as I like to hike ; just to see the sunrise :) So, after a week later he even told me that he wanted to treat me food and I was like - HUH? (like, what for? as I did not do anything for you) and he just say, "Is just a treat". I was like - Urm, Okay?!

If not, what am I supposed to say? No?
Well, Let's see whether will this works or not.

Point : He likes dogs too. But he have given away as he have no time to look after them.

2nd Guy
I meet this guy when I was going for a meeting with my Partner. He was all alone and I just created a chat. Gosh, I remember the hall was so cold and freeze. Anyhow after the meeting we were supposed to have a cig but eventually all of the corner or spaces was held "DO NOT SMOKE" sign. So we departed and bye to each other at the Carpark. But when we were having lunch around the area, This guy passed-by and we had great lunch. He even treated me and say's since it was my Birthday and I deserved the treat :) So nice! And on Monday, he came to my office and called me saying Let's smoke and I'm at your office ady. It was a shocking to received his call saying he was all here. We have great conversation and we have same commons in outdoor activities too. He goes on hiking, go-cart, kayaking, car tracks, etc. The time he says Kayaking, my eyes started to roll. I wanna go for that KAYAKING wei~ It should be REALLY FUN!

Point : He also likes dogs too. He says he takes his dog for a walk and have 2 dogs living with him. How's lovely. 

PS: Someone asked me to text him to ask which he would prefer for a cup of coffee.
A. Gloria Jeans
B. Starbucks
C. Coffee Beans
D. San Fransisco
And his reply was Gloria Jeans! (As most of my friends knows me, they all know that I do love Gloria Jeans alot!)

3rd Guy
My classmate tagged me on his Facebook that he just shared regards on coffees status. So I liked his shares and I commented "Cappuccino". One of the guy commented on my friend's too and ...

*I need to erase the names...  I just cant published it. Is forbidden *geez*

The conversation goes on till like 60+ comments... and he wanted to join for the coffee section where I supposed to meet my friend this coming Sunday. And in the end, I only know that he wasn't my schoolmate by my friend's buddy.

Seriously. I shouldn't think too much. We are just friends right?

But... something tells me ... differently.

Saturday, June 8, 2013

Signification Of A Dream

I've been dreaming about this same guy for 3 times now and each of the dreams lead us closer and closer. I felt love and I don't feel like waking up from my dreams. (oh ya! each time this dreams stopped was because my dog start barking) Infact, I like it a lot dreaming about him.

It's funny that I didn't think about him in reality. But he just suddenly popped up in my dreams and is very loving. This time I remember clearly:-

It was this weekend and I was walking towards my car. Location was at Menjalara which I just finished doing something (maybe borrowing a book or doing up my laundry). And I saw him. We chatted and we have a light breakfast together. We chatted, laughed and what I noticed is that we have this same similarity of our interest such as hiking, extreme sports, loves coffee and hanging out.

I asked him, how come he was at Menjalara as usually he will be at Desa Park City instead. He told me he just wanted a change and it was good to bump me here. I smiled.

While he walked me back to my car, instead of saying a Bye word, he said this :

"just a starter to make your day"

… and kissed me on my cheek.

I was stoned.

I had this butterflies flying in my stomach.

*oh ya! he's a married man but he wasn't in a good condition with his wife.

He smiled and walks away.

By then, I managed to hold his hand and asked him :

"what was that? do you have feelings for me?"

He replied "Yes, been a while actually. But I don't wanna rush and mess things up."


To cut my story short, we even went to Bukit Cahaya, Shah Alam and we went for a cycling. It was breezy and I do like cycling with the person I like as it's to free of my mind and think about an empty skies instead.

He even put a post-it note at my car window just to cheer me up. And decorate a post-it note of a love shape on top of my roof car, which is quite lovely and cute.


Hell yeah, my dog started to bark.

I missed my dream alot. I try to fall back to sleep after taking my dog for a walk just to cont'd the dream. But it wouldn't come.

So, I was confused.

In reality, we doesn't talk much with each other. I really really confused, why is only HIM?

I even Googled up and typed "Dreaming the same guy for a reason"

And here's the answer :-

What does it mean when you dream about the same person over and over again?
Dreaming about the same person over and over again could just mean that you are thinking about that person a lot in real life. It is thus natural that they also appear in your dream life. Your dream is telling you that it is time to let this person know how you feel, especially if you are dreaming of him or her in a good way. Only good things can happen from you telling him or her. Even if he or she is not interested, at least you can move on from the crush.

But then, I realized… if I and him were to be together. Will he just love me for this early stage and be just normal couples after a year like what I am having now?

I was just so scared to love someone once again after I've dated so many ex's. But I do hope I can find someone I can trust, spend the rest of my life just to be with him, and love him every seconds.

I wish...

Sunday, June 2, 2013

The clock is still ticking...

Counting down till 3 years, I think I need a break now.

To hang out with myself. Save money and not spend to others. Love myself more so I could have my normal dinner back, which I don't have it for like months and months now. To clean up, sweep and mop the house; which I have to do it all by myself. To focus on my career. And especially spend more time with my mother.

I don't understand myself and I've been telling myself that each time I will not spend for any boyfriend who ever I will be dating. But each time when I see their puppy eyes saying that they like the things very much (either clothing, accessories or perfumer, etc) and I straight get it for them.

As for myself, I don't even dare to spend like hundred to buy myself a clothing or any heels. And 2ndly, I don't quite like guys who buying for me either. Maybe I'm an Idiot. I should have spend guys money on myself which I shouldn't have stopped them rather than I spend on them instead.

Besides, our taste of food was different. I like going to Starbucks or Gloria Jeans, but he don't. I like eating xiong tong lala and crab at jinjang, where else he likes having crab at PJ. I like Korean BBQ food alot, where else I usually eat with him on Japanese food.

I've been thinking. Maybe because I'm in financial, and he's paying for the meals. So I have to cut off those things I like to eat, as I'm not paying it. But when I think of it, it doesnt feel right as previously my ex treated the food and drinks I like. So I still wondering. What's wrong in treating me on once a blue moon?

(That's why, to eat what I really love to eat, I need a break down. As once I start saving, I can eat whatever I've been longing or drink when ever I like)

I feel so stupid to date guys that suck all of my money.

Ok. Maybe not them who suck my money, but I'm the one who willing to give it to them?

Like seriously, if you love someone, you will definately madly in love with the person. Like the movie I've posted at my blog just few days back "Only You (Always)"it shows that how strong their love connection is. Where else, I dont think I'm having one right now.

I know how's the strong love connection is as I have that feeling before and it really do hurt me like hell when we broke off. I wish to find back the feeling and spend the rest of my life just with the person. But I dont think I have it now and I dont wanna waste any of our time as years is coming and our age are growing older.

Like I said before. I dont have any kisses or any intimates for years now. I even told the guy before that if one day he really kissed me, I might avoid, get angry or fought for him. As I might felt strange for : suddenly to start a kiss where else our feels was not there anymore.

Yes, I am thankful that he bought me a computer so I can work at home instead of OTing all nights at office. I know he cares. But cares and without any love ; it just seems not right enough.

I don't know. I'm stuck. I'm blank.

PS: If you know who you are, do give me some space for the time being. 10Q!

Friday, May 31, 2013

Always : Only You

From one of the song I usually like to listern and all of a sudden, I feel like watching their MTV and see how it looks like. But, all it lead was a pretty nice love movie which talks about a blind girl and a man who helped her to recover her eyesight.

It was touched to see such MTV. And I decided to youtube-ing this movie called " Always : Only You" and watched it after work.

Below is the link to watch the movie. Belive me. I've finished cried ....

Monday, May 27, 2013

Why do we need to have friends?

 The question is : Why do we need to have friend by your side?

But friend sometimes are quite irritating in sense of; when they have nothing good to do but interfering your life, lying to you or start gossiping about you, maybe?

When they like to do comparison on what you have and what they have better in their life. I don't think this is a kind of a sharing.


True friend are like listerning to your voice and comfort you in a really good way.

True friend are always be true to you and love you even you are in a bad condition or facing a hard time of financial problems and they are willing to lend you whatever they have in their pocket and doesnt even count with you nor chase you back whatever they borrowed you as in things or money.

True friend will never look down upon you but will always be there to lift up your spirit just to see you smile again.

That's what we need to find the TRUE FRIEND.

And I'm proud to say that I've actually found mine.

Thanks for being my friend, dear you.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Lucky Stage

I'm writting behalf of yesterday ; 19 April 2013 (Friday)

As usual (on previous days / years), my dog Fat-Fat will be barking non-stop as he's telling me "Hey! could you please walk faster, tie me in a lease and take me for a walk. I'm so gonna pee very soon".

But that day, his barking sounds differently and is just a medium range volume of a yapping sound. I know things weren't right. But still, I took him out for his usual morning walk. His speed of walking is just like mine. Slow and not really steady.

After the short walk, we went home and I was about to get ready to go out buying food for mum's breakie. What my dog usually do was - seating at the front gate and will be waiting for me to get home and greet me by barking out loud (as in "WHERE'S THE HELL YOU GO? Cut the crap, did you buy me something nice today?"), wagging his tail.

And that day was different. He did not wait for me to get home. He wasn't at his usual spot. When I opened up my gate, he was there - lying next just to my car.

I felt helpless.

I went to the kitchen and bring out 2 slices of bread. Lucky, he ate all 2 slices.

I kissed him goodbye before driving off to work. I even talked softly while hugging him and said "You will be alright. You have to wait for me to come back. You gotta stay strong fat-fat"

That day, once I've reached office. About an hour and I started to go client's side with my colleagues. Not only that, we have to go to AOT and to media side too to clarified on some important works. By then, about 7pm we stopped by at Midvalley and have our meals that comes with "Breakfast + Lunch + Dinner".

While ordering the food, my mum ringed me up. Saying that the dog vomitted twice and he seems quite weak. So I've told my mum to give him bread instead of solid dog food pedigree.

I wasn't in a mood when I've received the call. My mood goes down. I wanted to go home badly. But in the same time, I have to prepare files to send to the printer. Once I've done my part, I drove home.

I saw Fat-Fat. Lying down.

Seriously, I dont know what's wrong. I might think that he strikes tick fever, which can cause death. But I've been trying real hard to catch his ticks and spend time about 1.5hrs just to search his bodies for ticks and sprayed frontline.

That night, after taking him for his pee and poo, I fed him 3 slices of bread just to tempt him up. And started contd to search for any ticks that I can kill out from his body.

Suddenly, the light turned off.

Blackout again. ugh~

I searched for my lighter, starting to light up the tealights and put near to me and Fat-Fat. I accompany him from 11pm till 1.15am. I was so tired by then as I need to wake up at 3.30am to prepare myself for a hiking day.

I tried sleeping at the hall couch. But couldnt tuck myself up. The weather was so hot that I started to sweat a little bit. So I walked back to my room, hoping it would be okay. But worst, my room doesnt have window that the air can go in.


I've been turning around here and there. Looking at my phone that the time already shows 2.05am. I decided to sleep at the floor. As it might be a little cooler.

I felt nice. I put my phone next to me just incase I might fall asleep deep deep.


Something crawling at my leg. I thought it was just a dust and I swipe it off my leg. But hey...again at my leg. This time I felt is like - somesort of a spider thing. I got a little freaked out and climbed up my bed. Forced myself to sleep.

Despite, USELESS. My alarm rings at 3.30am.

I rested again. Suddenly the light was ON. My fan started to move. Argh! Why now when I was about to get ready?

Duh. I prepared myself. Wear my cons and first thing first, I went to check on my dog.

He sleeping. I thought he was dead. But his body was breathing. I called his name.



He slightly open his house. Didn't even move. I wanted to pat him but am afraid he might bite me or something. So I went inside the kitchen again and bring up 2 slice of bread.

I tempt him to get up. Poor boy, he was so lifeless that his hind legs couldn't really stand properly and he tries really hard to balance himself.

I felt really sad.

After feeding him, I hugged him saying he should wait for me to come home after hiking and I will bring him straight to the vet. I kept asking him to stay strong. Stay focus and wait till I come back and he just can't leave me alone here.

I kissed him goodbye before I drove off to Ken's house.


While hiking (This is 20 April 2013, Saturday), 6.15am my dad called me up. I stopped my step and asked, what's wrong? I know that it might be a really bad news that my dad suddenly called me.

Dad : Xter, Bad News.
Me : Please don't tell me that the dog passed away.
Dad : I think he might be going. His eyes were to dry and is about to close. I think I will just put him inside the bag.
Me : No. Don't. I have to bring him go to the vet later in the morning. Please dont. I will come back once I finished do my hiking. Let me do everything.
Dad : Ok then.

I contd to hike. Till about 7stgh am, we all hike back down and went to my house. I quickly get out from the car and there I saw him - standing and surprised to see me.

I got confused.

Confused in at 3.30am you were there, lying and doesnt want to move. And now, you can at least stand up. I was so happy.

Walked him for his usual morning walk. When he poo, it wasn't solid but abit milky. I know it's not right.

At about 11am, Ken bring me to the vet together with fat-fat. The doc asked me what's wrong with my dog and I told her everything. She took out the thermometer and stuck it at fat-fat ass and told me that he doesnt have fever and it might not be fever then. She started to check on his eyes and teeth and said there's nothing wrong with him except for cataract.

Then I told her about the ticks and am afraid that he might have tick fever (which actually can cause death). After a long conversation with the doctor, she gave me antibiotic and vitamin for fat-fat and also Bactidol for killing the ticks. She even told me that might be the weather of morning and night could make him uneasy. He might be feeling good at the morning but maybe at night, he will be lifeless.

As I've told the doctor that I might be losing him today due to his conditions.

But to see right now. He looks good.

Until, now at night. He been sleeping outside. Doesnt really want to move.

I wish him to get better.

He really can't leave me just like that. I understand he's an old boy now as I have him 10years now and that time he's already that big size. So he might be in 13-14years right now. But he just can't be totally fall sick all of a sudden. It really do frighten me up.

Can I say, I don't want to prepare for his leaving? I don't want him  to leave me now :(

But still, thanks for everyone who helped me to wish for my dog fat-fat so he can get well soon and have his normal health back. Thanks to GOD for answering my prayers too.

Thanks alot!